Joel 1:2-4 (NKJV) says:

1 “Hear this, you elders,

And give ear, all you inhabitants of the land!

2Has anything like this happened in your day?

Or even in the days of your fathers?

3 Tell your children about it,

Let your children tell their children,

And their children another generation.

4 What the chewing locust left, the swarming locust has eaten;

What the swarming locust left, the crawling locust has eaten;

And what the crawling locust left, the consuming locust has eaten.”

What we have literally here in this Scripture is a plague of locusts feeding on and destroying the land that produced the fruit and vegetables to feed the nation of Israel. What we have here symbolically is an progression of what happens when good people do nothing when evil is progressing, and then remains unconfronted and unstopped.

Read verse 4 over and notice the progression: chewing locusts, then swarming locusts, leading to crawling locusts, and finally the coup de grâce . . . the consuming locusts! Joel said that they were so invasive that there was no wine for the drink offering and no wheat for the grain offering.

I submit our nation might be experiencing something similar on a cultural level. Wave after wave of “locusts” are messing with the fiber of our families!

It started when the chewing locusts were allowed into our nation’s cultural influences. Those who brought in the more sophisticated so called “Enlightenment” period into our churches . . . who kicked out Jesus and just believed in some ambiguous God!

Then came the swarming locusts . . . the Horace Manns, the John Deweys who brought “progress” into our educational system by bringing in humanism. Do you see the downward spiral?

Some indisputable statistics tell us that the downward slide of this present generation, at least in behavior, started about the first time prayer was kicked out by our justice system in 1963. Here came the crawling locust . . . chewing away at our religious freedoms and dismissing God from the public arena of ideas in our public life—he essentials of who we are as a nation!

I don’t care who tells you the otherwise . . . we were a nation founded on Christianity! We weren’t colonized like other nations or cultures looking for gold. We came here specifically so we could follow Christ as we wanted to.

So the court ruling to remove prayer from the school system was nothing more than the “official” stamp on the removal of God (Jesus) from a very crucial part of our society. It was simply the first step of many more to follow which has contributed to the moral & spiritual disintegration of our country. It was a flying leap across the narrow chasm separating a God-fearing moral country and the chaotic “everything goes” situation we find ourselves in today.

With God taken out of many of our churches, our schools, and our public life, the consuming locusts seem to be coming after our last remaining key area—our castles! Our homes . . . the place where all teaching should commence, be sustained, and passed to our homes, our children’s homes, and our children’s children’s homes. Look back at those verses.

3 Tell your children about it,

Let your children tell their children,

And their children another generation.

In our book Family Fragrance, Gail and I tell how this is to be carried out in the home. We’ve been pounding on this on our local radio broadcast. If you missed them go to the web site heritagebuilders.com on the first page, left middle. All shows are archived there. Moms in particular, let me remind you how this happens 24/7 in the home one more time.

A. affection

R. respect

O. order

M. merriment

A. affirmation

The family is depending on you Mom and Dad! It’s depending on your nurturing hearts, your soft hands, your strong arms, your biblical imperative, and your natural instinct to see to it that your children know TRUTH!

Question: What can you do to keep the locusts at bay when it comes to raising your children?

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Seems the longer Gail and I (Otis) hold Heritage Builder Workshops, the more we find ourselves being locked into the Grand Parent roles.

Although most of our attendees are there as parents, we find our role as grandparents slowly leaching to the top of the conversations. Which is okay with me because that is what we are. Oh, make no mistake we are still parents. We still have three children. I agree with those who say “Once a parent, always a parent!”

But we have moved to a higher level of parenting. Now we are not just parents . . . we are GRAND parents.

A few years ago I was invited to be the keynote speaker of the CASA Convention at the Anaheim Hilton. Knowing those in attendance would be the cream of the crop volunteers and church staff personnel working with senior adults, I began to gear my speech toward that age demographic.

I have been a pastor now for more than 26 years, and one of the questions pitched to me from a growing group of folks who have raised their children and are now card-carrying members of the grandparents club is, “As a grandparent, what is my role?” I tell them it’s sort of like the opening phrase of a famous book, “It is the best of times, and it is the worst of times!”

Believe me, it is difficult to know when to get involved and when to back off when it comes to our children raising our grandchildren. Grandkids are the greatest gift ever afforded to parents. Grandkids know how special grandparents are and grandparents know how special grandkids are. The reason grandparents and grandkids get along so well someone said, is that we both engage the same enemy!

Well, because I get asked what their role might be, I decided to come up with an answer that included an acrostic so all us grandparents could remember what our role really is. And what better acrostic than using the word G.R.A.N.D.? So here it is. Giving Resources And Needed Direction.

• Giving Resources. Grandparents—whether we realize it or not—have a wealth of resources. With the kids out of the house, we have more funds to do some fun things with the grandkids. We have the resource of more time, and we certainly have the resource of wisdom.

We have purchased that wisdom by redeeming our life experiences for knowledge. It’s not that we are smarter than our kids; it’s just that we have traveled further down the road.

We’ve been there and we know where the chuck holes are, we know where the detours signs are erected. So . . . we can spend time with our grandkids, giving them the wisdom our experiences have purchased. They will catch it just by hearing our stories and seeing our lives. It is more caught than taught!

• And Needed Direction. Notice I didn’t say needed discipline. I said direction. We have the opportunity to point the way to truth. Unless we are the primary care-giver, we should not be the disciplinarian. Our job is to show the way to Truth with a capital “T” with what we do and what we say! You also notice I said “needed” direction. If it is not asked for . . . if it is not needed by their parents, then “butt out.”

Gail and I use this acrostic, and we find ourselves very content in our role. If you are a grandparent, try it out. See if it will work for you. If you are still just a parent . . .  put it in the back of your mind. For sure, you will need it quicker than you think!

I don’t have a question for you today. I have a challenge! Work together . . . because when parents and grandparents work together, the job of parenting gets a little easier!

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On Sunday after church, my son-in-law was invited to reconnect with some old high school buddies for a round of golf a few miles north of town.

And because my daughter is an RN at the Fresno Surgery Center and was scheduled to work for the day as part of her rotation, that left their two little ones particularly in Grandma and Grandpa’s care. These two little blondes are full of life and energy, which caused me to realize why God gives us children in our YOUTH! After teaching an adult class and delivering a Sunday morning sermon, I (Otis) was usually pretty pooped. The last thing on my mind was helping to herd a couple of energized preschoolers.

Gail had the family to cook for, so it fell to me to oversee the two whirlwinds before lunch. While the rest of the family was in route for Sunday dinner, the little ones immediately headed for the back patio door. It was a gorgeous day outside and the cement area of the patio is where they wanted to play.

After all there are toys galore out there, not to mention tricycles, mini push cars, and a sidewalk that meanders around the back of the house guarded by beautiful plants and flowers. Along the path is a water faucet with an attached garden hose, which is a huge temptation for a three-and-a-half year old—especially with a two-year-old sister in tow who could serve as a target if she could get the water turned on before Grandpa could figure out what she is up to!

Now, Grandma Gail and Grandpa Otis are not amateurs at this parenting thing. We’ve been around the block a time or two when it comes to staying ahead of the kids or in this case, grandkids. So a few years ago we thought of expanding our house because of our expanding family.

After putting pen to paper, we figured out the cost of city approval with permits and all, plus construction, could be expensive so we put our brain power to work and came up with a plan for how we could expand the kid’s activity space without touching the house.

Through a friend, we had three custom play houses built. Instead of placing them on the ground, we had a large deck built to set the three play houses on which made it look similar to an old western town’s boardwalk. A large crane was brought in to lift the three play houses over the roof of our house and placed strategically on the wooden deck. There is a cottage, a general store complete with a wood awning, and a church with a beautiful steeple. All three are outfitted with electric lights inside and out. They are all beautifully appointed with the proper furniture inside. Really, it’s a child’s dream.

Well, today after the two little ones realized they could not soak each other with the water hose, they headed for the play houses. While sitting on the back yard deck, I could hear the little ones playing and dreaming and pretending. They leave the cottage and go to church. On the way home from church, they stop at the general store for supplies. They cook lunch and invite me over to their outside patio between the church and general store to taste some ice cream and drink a diet coke they have served up.

While sitting there watching the two little ones play, I realize that on this day their talk mirrors the talk which happens every Sunday at our dinner table and what they learn from the children’s programs at church . . . my heart swells with joy. Not long afterwards, they were quiet (when kids get quiet, it is time to check things out), so I quietly walked to the little houses.

I peeked into the cottage and they were not there. I looked inside the general store . . . nobody. I’m a little worried now, and as I looked through the arched door to the entrance of the little church, they were kneeling at the little pew we bought for the church and were praying! I think there was a mist that clouded my eyes when once again I was reminded how getting our faith to the next generation comes through what their little eyes are watching and what their little minds are thinking.

What Gail and I say to parents who attend our workshops is still so true! These principles are more caught than taught!

Question: How intentional are you concerning your values when your children are within reach?

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Today is a new beginning of sorts for us. Actually, we know all this happened yesterday, but I (Gail) wrote this yesterday:

Today is April 3, 2012, and our oldest granddaughter Riley Nicole becomes a teenager. We plan to keep some of the old traditions, but becoming a teenager is pretty important nowadays, so we also plan to start some new ones.

As usual, she and her cousin Madalyn (granddaughter #2) spent the night with us, as has become their custom. That means we pig out on food, play some Sorry together (Grandpa always takes the brunt of that game when he plays—they don’t seem to feel it’s fair to pick on Grandma J), enjoy our outside patio after picking out a cold drink from the stash in the garage refrigerator, take a bubble bath, talk girl talk, watch old McGee & Me videos, and listen to Odyssey tapes till they fall asleep, and then sleep in late.

I try to make it a point to wake them with hot tea or cocoa on cold mornings or smoothies in hot weather, and then they get to pick what they want for breakfast. Then it’s more play time and just doing things “they’ve always done.”

These traditions just seem to take on a life of their own . . . “Can we, Grandma? We always do!” And always, before they head home, we finish off every sleepover with a tea party. I have a large collection of one-of-a-kind tea cups, so before I begin preparations for our tea, they get to pick which one they want to use and bring it to me before they go back out to play or go hangout in “their” bedroom. I use my best china and silverware, fancy napkins, cream and sugar with sugar lumps and tongs, with tiny sandwiches, cheeses, fruit, confections, and specialty chocolates. I try to add something new each time. But the tea always seems to be the favorite!

Tonight, Riley and her family of six will all go to their favorite restaurant together, as is their tradition. Last Sunday, when all 20 of us gathered around our big table for Sunday dinner after church, we all celebrated Riley’s birthday together, giving her presents and singing “Happy Birthday” loud and off-key as usual . . . as is our tradition.

This year our new teenager got more clothes and girly things rather than toys. Otis and I started a new tradition a few years back when each of the girls turned eight—each birthday they get a gift but also a porcelain teacup, which will give them quite a personal collection when each gets married someday.

But this year we added a new tradition: when they become teenagers, they will get their first teapot. We’ll probably add silver spoons, embroidered napkins, and other essentials for tea parties through the years.

It always amazes me to hear how important these traditions are in the lives of our family. I’m sure your family has traditions that are just particular to you. Already the younger girls were talking among themselves as to what kind of teapot they would like to get someday.

Traditions give a family a sense of belonging and being loved, which are absolutely as essential today as they have always been!

Question: What new tradition would you like to intentionally begin this week? This month?

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Gail and I, for the last two years at our own expense, have taken the Heritage Builders workshops and message to families across the Atlantic.

In the summer of 2010, we met with six people—a missionary and members of three different families all related to one another—in Baptist church in Paris. After a five-hour presentation and an hour prayer time, the job of getting the message to French families about how to be intentional about the legacy they leave was passed to a French lay couple, Romain and Rachel Denis, and their Graines2vie ministry.

After rejoicing over that success, we traveled again to France in July 2011 to train 95 people gathered from throughout France at a retreat in Normandy. Heritage Builders is growing quickly there, and HB materials are being translated into the French language and distributed across the country.

Along with France, workshops have been presented in Germany, Poland, Belgium, and the United Kingdom with excellent results. Also, Heritage Builders has gained a presence in Russia, where Katya Gildabrand travels her country teaching HB workshops to large crowds.

HB has found that families are struggling all over the world as possibilities for ministry are coming from Africa, Peru, Portugal, India, and China. Heritage Builders is hoping the next big push will be in the Philippines. While attending a national meeting in Fort Worth, Texas, I met with executives of the Global Surge movement lead by Greg Lyons. The two ministries are seeking a partnership for HB to help facilitate a family-training posture to help disciple the great crowds who are presently being won to Christ.

Gail and I ask you to put this global move on your prayer list and daily lift up Heritage Builders before the throne! We will keep you informed as to the next step that will need to be taken to introduce Heritage Builders to the Filipino people and the other countries requesting HB’s presence.

It seems the families of our 21^st century world are in desperate need of the Lord’s teaching on how He intended the family to work as a refuge to train and form the character of the next generation.

Remember this need and pray we will be able to train “boots on the ground.”

Question: Will you covenant to pray with us as the door to this huge opportunity slowly swings open?

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For all intents and purposes your life, as it is at the moment, is the product of your worldview, which has produced the myriad decisions you’ve made, small and large, down through the years.

In fact, we are all the products of our decisions over the course of our lives. What we will be in the future relies heavily on the decisions we make today and those awaiting us tomorrow. As the ancient proverb states, “Every decision is a destination.”

A doctor is the product of many decisions made in his youth concerning discipline, education and goals. A felon is the product of different decisions about similar issues. The decisions they reached, however, were a product of the worldview possessed by each. Their respective worldviews took the information available and interpreted it in different ways, and thus they reached different destinations.

Our worldview is the fundamental operating system that influences the decisions we make. Those decisions construct our future—and then our history.

But it is “incorrect” these days to tell people they are wrong!

Right?

Our culture places a high premium on its so-called tolerance while systematically vilifying traditional concepts of family as repressive and antiquated. The pressure to embrace new “models” of the family is ubiquitous. I believe, however, the determining factor in what one will conclude about the contemporary notions is not a question of either media propaganda or fact. It is a worldview issue.

What a person chooses to embrace concerning the evolving definitions of the family—or the evolving definitions of anything else—depends upon what that person has already embraced as the most fundamental principles of life. A person may choose to take on new models of the family, for instance, because he believes we’re evolving—physically and socially—with no end in sight.

Though the entire process is unfolding at random, perhaps this person has chosen “love” as the highest virtue —and love is surely victimless and should know no boundaries. In this view, any combination of persons, regardless of age or gender, who sincerely love one another, can be a family.

Another person may thoroughly reject the proposition that love is all we need in order to have a family. And it is neither bigotry nor “intolerance” that has influenced her; rather, it’s a worldview that recognizes God as the author of morality.

As such, what He has said about the definition of the family will be embraced. No amount of media or contemporary influence can sway her, because the fundamental principles of her life place a higher premium on the truth of God than on feelings of “love,” however much those may be prized.

And this is the internal influence that ultimately leads to certain kinds of actions.

Question: What decisions have you made concerning discipline, education, and goals with your children that have influenced your worldview!

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I (Otis) was teaching a lesson to a Bible Study group on faith served up family style.

It was actually a verse-by-verse look at the Book of Hebrews, a challenge in itself, but my eyes fell on Chapter 11 and the 20th through the 24th verses. One can read this passage and skim right over the value of a particular component found in the tree of this family. It is easily skimmed over, perhaps because it strikes no chord or strums no notes in this modern culture of ours.

When is it that a boy becomes a man? When does a little girl evolve into a woman? These questions are not surface questions. If one thinks about them, answers may come in the form of some milestone in their life, like when they get a driver’s license or when they graduate from high school.

But seriously . . . when?

Attending a Promise Keepers rally years ago, I heard several men decry the fact that there was never a point in time when their fathers ever told them it was okay to call themselves a man, or when their father declared in a simple sentence that they were now a man.

I remember hearing the pain in their voices as they confessed that lack of connection with their fathers. I can’t say I have heard the same at a Women of Faith rally because I’ve never actually attended one, but I have counseled females who are just as confused about when they become a woman as the men are about when they become a man.

As I read the passage in Hebrews, I realized I was reading an answer to that family conundrum. In plain sight the verbiage used shows how from generation to generation this mystery was solved through a seemingly simple but profound ceremony.

The Blessing!

Absorb the moment as you read this passage from Hebrews 11:

20 By faith Isaac blessed Jacob and Esau in regard to their future.

21 By faith Jacob, when he was dying, blessed each of Joseph’s sons, and worshiped as he leaned on the top of his staff.

The importance of that blessing included the fact that these blessed were now responsible for their own spiritual disciplines . . . that they were now to enter the realm of the adults . . . as a man, as a woman. What an incredible truth. What an outstanding rite of passage. The passage goes forward to say . . .

22 By faith Joseph, when his end was near, spoke about the exodus of the Israelites from Egypt and gave instructions concerning the burial of his bones.

23 By faith Moses’ parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw he was no ordinary child, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.

24 By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter.

This is faith served up family style. Father to son. Generation after generation. Then choices were made by those who were blessed that demonstrate the value of that critical component of life!

About 140 people gathered in January 2000 as Gail and I gave the blessing to our last child Leah in a rite of passage ceremony. Later Leah told us that it was that element of family that came to her mind when she was in college, 2,500 miles from home, and she had the opportunity to enter into the temptations of spring break—and refused! The vows connected with the family blessing are meant to be that impacting.

Question: When does a young boy become a man, and when does a young girl become a woman in your family or within your realm of friends?

For further study on the issue of a Blessing and Rite of Passage, check out our book Spiritual Milestones: A Guide to Celebrating Your Child’s Spiritual Passages at

http://www.heritagebuilders.com/Parenting.html

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Probably everybody knows what a carpenter’s level looks like.

For sure, no handy man doing work around the house, such as hanging pictures or fixing door frames, would get very far without one. So when I (Otis) had mine in my hand one day, it occurred to me that a level would be a good object lesson on how to manage the atmosphere of the home, particularly when the order or rhythm of the home is out of balance.

Imagine that the bubble in the middle represents a balance of order, or the management or the rhythm of the home. If you move to center right, it represents over-management, and if you move to the far right, it represents iron-fisted management. Now go back to the middle bubble. Then move middle left and that represents under-management, and the far left represents non-management.

The question then is if this level was placed on the management of your home, which of the five descriptions would fit?

Let me go a little deeper with the illustration. As we attempt to manage our homes and relationships well, we must strike a happy balance between the two extremes. We don’t want liberty to lead to license, or control to lead to confinement. The goal is freedom within generous boundaries. The way we manage our homes will be the way our children will manage their worlds. We are conveying to them—if not in word, at least in deed—how family affairs are to be ordered.

Both extremes on either side of the carpenter’s level picture homes that are out-of-control. Basically the parent(s) are reacting to their child’s behavior. Both extremes reveal homes that are abnormal and chaotic. And listen with me a minute at what those chaotic homes sound like—there is probably a lot of screaming going on.

Who is doing the yelling? Usually if the parent is doing the yelling while the child is pretty much silent, that portrays an over-managed or iron-fisted home. Out of fear, the children may be silent, but that usually means there is silent suffering or seething rage.

And in the homes where the parents have lost control and liberty has turned to license, usually it’s the kids that have initiated the screaming at their permissive parents. The parents may react with bigger and better (empty) threats, but it is still a house in chaos.

Instead of reacting, the parents need to be acting.

In the desire to be in control, who’s doing the yelling in your house? Is it the out-of-control bully parent, or the out-of-control overindulged child? How can we get back to that well-managed home idea where the parents actually act like the parent, instead of react—trying to “show who’s boss” or be their child’s BFF.

The idea of having an orderly home could be defined like this: “The act of managing and modeling godly leadership in the home, resulting in a refuge of calm.” That sounds a whole lot more pleasant and fun than the other two chaotic extremes.

Question:

Who’s trying to take control by doing the yelling in your home? You? . . . your teen? . . . your preschooler?

If you are interested in more information and discussion on this topic, please go to HB Radio and listen to radio shows #22-25, especially #25. There will be more to follow.

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I (Otis) explained to a recent counselee that it should be no bolt out of the blue that men and women are not created the same. Not only are we different physically, we are different psychologically.

The wife had blurted out that they were in to see me because she and her husband fight! Imagine that . . . a married couple that fights! They have been married for 10 years, and if each year represented one round in a prizefight, they have gone ten rounds . . . and she is exhausted!

The marriage is reeling, the kids are frightened as to what might happen, and she has no answers and neither does he. When asked if they love each other, the answer is “Yes,” without hesitation. When asked if they are they sitting in front of me to call it quits, the answer is “No,” again without hesitation!

It wasn’t long into the session that I found out that they both were list keepers. He could articulate every misstep she had ever made, and she could get just as historical! I thought at any moment, I may have to don my vertical black-and-white-striped shirt and blow a few whistle blasts to get control of the session, but when each had their say, things finally settled down.

There was a long pause . . . and I let the pause happen, and I allowed it to lengthen purposefully.

As any counselor will tell you, you can’t fix most problems in a single visit, and this one was not the exception. We have met on several occasions and have been successful in getting a few things adjusted so we can now go in a straight line toward success. But there are those moments when just the right illustration or just the perfect story hits your mind at just the right time and like a perfect storm, it all comes together.

Well, that happened today. The illustration came from my wife, Gail. I had actually heard her tell it to a group of women to whom she was speaking, and it stuck in my mental illustration file for use on a difficult situation, and today was it! Actually, she is sitting beside me as I am writing this blog. How about I just slide the keyboard over to her and let her finish this illustration in her own words, just as she told the ladies gathered at the conference where she was speaking . . .

From Gail:

“The best seller Men Are from Mars, Women Are From Venus is a funny tale about how different the two sexes are and how they think. And all of us agree with a big, “Duh! Ya Think?”

Early in our marriage, I was surprised at how often my romantic suitor hurt my feelings with what he said or did—or what he did not do. After a few angry fights, sleepless nights, and silent treatments, I decided I needed to take a new tactic. I needed to pick and choose my battles better. This was especially true when I knew he loved me and would give his life for me without even thinking if I were in danger. And yet he still hurt my feelings . . .

Back then we were younger, but we were still relatively mature adults who were passionate about serving God and about each other. We both wanted a happy family and were committed to do what it took to have it. So you have to start with some maturity first for this to work. And then add some old-fashioned common sense.

So here is what I came up with. Now you can take it or leave it.

When Otis really hurts my feelings or thoughtlessly slights me in some way (remember, I’m dealing with a man from Mars), I try not to react but rather quietly wait two days.

If I have forgotten it after two days and two nights, it was obviously inconsequential and is forgotten. Just a momentary brain freeze by the human man who loves me.

But if it is still in my heart after two days, I make sure he is satisfied in every way (yes, that is what I mean). I make a good dinner, and I let him relax. We have a nice time eating when he gets home. Then when we are done, I say, “I need to talk to you about something.”

While I am in my right mind and not angry, I simply tell my story as I saw it. And because he was focused somewhere else and didn’t intend to hurt me, he responds correctly. And we both learn, and all is well. (I did this when kids were still in our home, too.)

So, ladies, my entreaty is for you to wait two days. It’ll keep. We are all human, and maybe we take married life and family life a little too seriously sometimes. Perhaps we need to give each other some slack more often. Being married—and happily—takes hard work, and can be the greatest blessing to an individual . . . and especially to their children!”

Question: Do you think this could work for you?

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Life is a journey—which at the end of the road reveals a destination.

There is an eternal destination, and there is a life’s work destination. Either teaches us that we are a people of destiny.

Gail and I realized that truth as we were raising our three children. We wanted to be sure of their eternal destination, and we wanted each of them to be sure of their life’s work destination. Each child had a special giftedness that was evidenced through their talents, natural abilities, and personality traits.

It was and continues to be a fun and exciting thing to watch from the vantage point of our “box seats” as their parents! We know they have places to go and hills to climb. On the easier flat places they traverse, we sit back with our thumbs under our suspenders to allow our chests to expand with pride, and on the hills they climb, we sit on the edge of our chairs biting our nails, ready at a moment’s notice to help if asked (whether “the ask” is overt or covert in its delivery).

But in the course of parenting, we realized that there were at least two positions we could take on the road to their destination; two ways of dealing with their life choices. We could be ambulance drivers or guard rail builders.

Of the two, we chose to build guard rails, because we felt that was the biblical way. In Ephesians 5 and 6, the Apostle Paul gives the responsibilities of each member of the family in capsule form. He says:

• “Husbands, love.”

• “Wives, respect.”

• “Children, obey.”

• “Fathers, don’t raise angry children.”

In this, he lays out the most basic need of each member. For the wife, it is to be loved. For the husband, it is to be respected. For the children, it is to obey. And full circle back to the man, it is don’t provoke your children to anger.

Allow me to hone in on the next to the last command, “Children, obey.” The most basic need for a child is to be taught to obey. There are some parents who see this responsibility in the following manner. As the kids are climbing the hills, being children and with lack of maturity and judgment, they will likely—on some occasion when the parents aren’t paying close attention—be allowed to run off the cliff . . . for their own good, of course.

Mom and Dad will be there as paramedics with stretcher and ambulance to help pick up the pieces. That is the thrust of their parenting. “Surely,” they say, “one fall off the cliff will teach them all the lessons they need to learn about such foolish actions while on a hill climb!” Then they cross their fingers, hoping the kid survives the fall!

Then there are parents who climb the hills ahead of time and construct guard rails, all the while knowing that in the foolishness of growing up, the rails will be tested. Usually they hold! But sadly, if not, they know there will be ambulance drivers down at the bottom of the hill to help them survive the fall.

Ephesians 6 says that children’s most basic need is to obey. It is Gail’s and my opinion that we are intentionally called as parents to be more guard rail builders than ambulance drivers, although we qualify for that driver’s license also!

Question:

Are your parenting skills more like intentional guard rail builders or disengaged EMTs, ready to pick up the pieces?

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